Derby Horse
A jogger running down a country road is startled as a horse yells at him “Hey-come over hear buddy”.
The jogger is stunned but runs over to the fence where the horse is standing and asks”Were you talking to me”?
The horse replies”Sure was, man I’ve got a problem. I won the Kentucky Derby a few years ago and this farmer bought me and now all I do is pull a plow and I’m sick of it. Why don’t you run up to the house and offer him $5,000 to buy me. I’ll make you some money ‘cuz I can still run.”
The jogger thought to himself,”boy a talking horse” Dollar signs started appearing in his head. So he runs to the house and the old farmer is sitting on the porch. The jogger tells the farmer”Hey man, I’ll give you $5,000 for that old broken down nag you’ve got in the field”.
The farmer replies, “Son you can’t believe anything that horse says. He’s never even been to Kentucky.”
Horse Mounting And More
Q. Why did the woman get thrown out of the riding stable?
A. She wanted to mount the horse her way.
:P 
Man goes to the zoo
But when he arrives there’s only a dog
It was a Shitzu
:P
Another Horse Joke
I had a near death experience that has changed me forever. The other day I went horseback riding. Everything was going fine until the horse started bouncing out of control. I tried with all my might to hang on, but was thrown off. Just when things could not possibly get worse, my foot gets caught in the stirrup. When this happened, I fell head first to the ground. My head continued to bounce harder as the horse did not stop or even slow down. Just as I was giving up hope and losing consciousness, the Walmart manager came and unplugged it. Thank Goodness for heroes!
Funny Horse Joke
A cowboy goes into a bar, has a beer, walks outside and finds out that his horse has been stolen. He walks back into the bar, fires his gun through the ceiling and screams: “Which one of you mothers stole my hoss?” he yells. No one answers. “All right, I’m gonna have one more beer and if my hoss ain’t outside by the time I finish, I’m gonna do what I dun in Texas.” He drinks another beer, walks outside, and his horse is back. So he gets on it and gets ready to ride out of town. The bartender walks out of the bar and asks, “Say pardner, what happened in Texas?” The cowboy turns to him, and says, “I had to bloody walk home.”
